Farrah Abraham
appeared on the Dr. Phil show today and...well, let's just say it was a lot of information to take in.

We got schooled on a couple of concepts, heard some things that creeped us out a little and even learned a few new words!

Here are the top five things we learned from Farrah's Dr. Phil appearance:

5. Driving Around the Corner Doesn't Count As Driving...If You Park After

In light of her recent DUI arrest, Dr. Phil asked Farrah about the incident, giving her a chance to explain herself...or maybe even say she regrets it. Naturally, she did neither.

Farrah explained to Dr. Phil that she was NOT driving, she was parking.

OK, so she may have driven around the corner to park (no point in parking an already parked car, is there?), but that doesn't count as driving...

When Dr. Phil couldn't quite wrap his head around the concept that driving around the corner doesn't constitute driving (as the arresting officers apparently couldn't, either), Farrah became visibly annoyed.

4. Dr. Phil is a Negative Nelly

After Dr. Phil had asked Farrah all about her DUI, he started asking questions about the sex tape...presumably both of those subjects being the reason he had her on the show in the first place.

Farrah gets extremely annoyed at Dr. Phil and after arguing with him about every minute detail of each of the incidents and why she isn't at fault in either of them, she explains to the bewildered host that the problem is that he's just being too negative.

3. Hot for Daughter?

When Farrah's dad, Michael, is explaining his stance on the sex tape, things start to get a little weird.

First, he defends it, saying that she was doing something personal and she should have the right to do that if that's what she wants to do. Fine, everyone is entitled to their opinion...no big deal.

But, when Michael starts talking about why people might be interested in seeing a Farrah sex tape, it got a little uncomfortable.

"I feel that my daughter is very attractive," he explained.

Michael then goes on to discuss how Farrah is a model and he was thinking maybe Playboy or Penthouse rather than a sex tape, which isn't creepy at all...

2. Couple of New Words

Farrah's dad is mad at Farrah's porno partner, James Deen, and he thinks that his behavior is flat-out "abusive." We run into a little problem, however, when he decides to elaborate on that. "He had no disregard" for how it would impact Farrah's family.

But wait, wouldn't having NO disregard mean that he DID have regard?

Farrah also took the liberty of teaching us a new word.

While explaining to Dr. Phil that she respects herself and is not trashy, she tells him that things just got "construted" in such a way that it made her appear differently.

1. Semantics

Learning about driving while not "driving" was just one of the many lessons we learned.

Farrah also taught us that having sex on tape does not count as a sex tape. In fact, Farrah refused to admit that she'd made a sex tape, insisting that she just had sex on tape for personal use (See: Sex tape), but that she doesn't think it's a "sex tape."

Also, if she WERE to look at it as a sex tape, Farrah says that it's not for sale...but someone WILL have to pay a certain dollar amount if they want to release it. So, yeah..

Did you watch Farrah's Dr. Phil episode? If so, what did you think?

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