Well, we hope they're not being serious, anyway.
During a recent chat with DJ Smallzy, things took a detour to potty humor, as Michael Clifford revealed his resolution: "Mine is going to be to help Luke stop having diarrhea." Luke Hemmings added, "Mine is to buy Imodium pills..."
Calum Hood didn't take it all too seriously either, saying, "I want to finally get that boob job I've always wanted!"
Michael also slipped in a comment about getting a penis reduction. So. Yeah.
The guys are gearing up for a new tour in 2015, as they tweeted: "Excited to start touring again! Thanks to everyone that got #LIVESOS, hope you're loving it..."
Let's just hope Luke clears up his bathroom problems by then, lol.