What Happened When I Tried 10 Different Nail Trends - AT ONCE

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Here's a confession: I've never gotten my nails done before. I'm a simple girl with a large nail polish collection and tend to just paint them a different color every week. Done. Plus, I have bad nail habits and assumed I would be met with great judgement or tsk tsk'ing by the manicurist (like they do at the dentist when you admit that you don't floss). Excuses, excuses. But then I got the opportunity to try out a nail trend. Actually, 10 nail trends. All at the same time. Go big or go home, right folks? Right.

The challenge required a free afternoon, a very patient manicurist (shout out to Amie and the awesome folks at Federico Beauty Institute in Sacramento, California!), and these 10 trends:
First of all, let me say that getting your nails done is a strange experience. There's a lot of cuticle pushing, sanding and inhalants. The chemicals are pretty crazy, you guys. I thought that nails were just glued on top of the nail bed - uh, no. These people sculpt nails on top of your nails, and the stuff is solid. It becomes a part of you. Which was fun and not fun when it came time to take it all off.
After asking Amie if anyone had ever come to her for this many different trends at once (they hadn't), we got to work. As you can see from my face, it was quite the task. Amie said that the stiletto nails were a fairly common request, and that the aquarium nails had been a on/off trend for a while.

A few hours, a lot of acrylic, sanding, nail polish, and glitter later, the results were amusing if not jarringly impractical.
1. Bubble This one sucked. It was crazy thick/dome-like, and weighed down my finger. And that wasn't even as severe as some of the bubble nails I've seen. It brought to mind one of those chips made for scooping dips. Gross.

2. Dew Drop This one actually turned out really cool, the texture and top coat made it look very realistic. The consensus around the salon was that it would make a great accent nail.

3. Duck Feet No. Honey.

4. Flip This one was one of my favorites. It's a simple polish with a surprise - an accent color on the flip side. We went with glitter, which is the only way I'll ever do these in the future (I mean, sometimes a girl just needs glitter).

5. Spine - This was a pretty simple idea - a bold nail with a feathery spine painted on. I actually kept this design on my nail after the intense removal process.

6. Rich Fall Color in Matte I also kept this one after. It was simple and classic - great for autumn wardrobe colors. No fuss!

7. 3D So pretty! The only issue with this design, according to the manicurist, is that it's not great for people that have to use their hands a lot. Like people with jobs or apartments without dishwashers (I have both those things! Lucky me!), because a lot of friction will cause the jewels/3D parts to just fall off or become weird. So fun to look at, though.
8. Aquarium I have a love/hate relationship with the Aqua nail. It's really thick and long, like, part of it was glued to my fingertip. It was super painful to take off. But! I had a snow globe on my finger! It was a little too much fun to shake around. Fun and distracting (I would never accomplish anything. I have the attention span of an excited toddler).

9. Stiletto - SO sassy. The ladies at the salon agreed that this one was great because of the way it elongates the finger. I liked it because it made me feel like a character from Buffy the Vampire Slayer for some reason. I also joked that no one should pick a fight with me with stiletto nails. The reality with this one, however, is that I would inevitably end up stabbing myself or anyone I tried to hug. So less Buffy, more Edward Scissorhands.

10. Dealer's choice - the traditional "Pink & White" I asked Amie to choose her favorite trend that she thinks will be coming up. "People are always going to ask for the pink and white French tip, it's a classic," she said.
So there you go, dear reader. Ten trends in one. Amie said she thinks the simpler looks are what's coming back in style, which makes her happy. And me, too. Because ain't nobody got time to deconstruct 10 different (well, 8, because I kept the thumbs) nails. Also, having so many different shapes on my nails made doing simple things rather difficult. For example:
Actually, I'm gonna share with y'all what happens when you try to take nails off. Basically you soak your nails in bowls of acetone for at least an hour, hopefully with a good Netflix marathon going on in the background. It basically means dissolving concrete off your body, so next time you're thinking of getting a crazy manicure, remember this comes with the territory (RIP, IKEA bowls), and it ain't so pretty.


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