On Monday night during Dancing With The Stars, I found out that Carlos PenaVega, 1/4 of my favorite boy band, Big Time Rush, had fallen into a deep depression in 2012. That year happened to be the peak of BTR's career. The guys were on tour and like all artists would say, there's something about tour that's a huge rush - between meeting all the fans, traveling places, crazy (and probably annoying AF) sleep schedules - and then there's the fact that hey you're living your dream! So yeah, that's a lot to deal with.
Turns out, after the tour, he felt alone. He said he would lock himself in his house and wouldn't want to see anyone. He was in a really dark place. But what shocked me the most was when I heard him say he smoked weed almost every day. As soon as I heard that, my jaw dropped. We never knew what Carlos was going through. We never knew he felt so alone. But he hid it so well. He was the funny, crazy and goofy one of the group with smiles 24/7. To know now that once the cameras were away and when he was alone, he felt alone...it's actually really sad to think about.
But there is a happy ending. That same year, Carlos decided to go to church one Sunday and not too long later, he was invited to a Bible study. And it just so happens that in that Bible study, he met his wife Alexa. Then his life changed for the better. Now I've always loved Alexa. She was always really nice to the fandom. I call her mom and say Carlexa are my parents! (Because who doesn't love Carlexa?!) But I never knew how much she's done for Carlos. I don't think I'll ever be able to thank her enough.
So I guess that, even if we think we know everything about one of our favs, we never really know what goes on behind closed doors, when the cameras are off. But we will always be there for them.
We Love You Carlos <3