Maybe that was the problem? I was expecting the work of building a relationship or keeping a relationship from one guy instead of taking the time to - maybe dare I say it - date more than one guy at once. It's really the ethical standard that society has come up with that has me confused. Women are taught from such a young age that we just have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince. We just have to endure mismatch after mismatch until we land on the "right one" or we get picked to be The Bachelorette (and even then we catch a lot of grief).
I use to think that you had to date or be involved with one guy at a time to have good dating karma, but maybe I'm wrong. All this time, could I be playing by rules that no one follows anymore?
My sorority sisters Melina Singer and Erica Sarmiento made a wonderful point about monogamy in today's world when I posed the question, "Is monogamy obsolete?"
"There are plenty of men and women who are happy with their partners and do not feel the need to look for anything else in anyone else. However, I would say that monogamy APPEARS to be obsolete at times because apps such as Tinder exist, and there are people who are unhappy in their relationships, but they stay regardless because it's easier or 'comfortable'. The Internet and apps like Tinder can put strains on relationships because there are people in relationships who still have Tinder accounts for whatever reason...Also, technology makes it much easier for people to 'look but not touch,' so rather than questioning if the concept of monogamy is dead, it's more about questioning people's likelihood to remain faithful within their monogamous relationships."
Looking at everything from another point of view, I can't help but wonder, maybe we just see monogamous dating and relationships differently from person to person. Is our monogamy just strained because of the influence of technology or is it really because maybe we can't just envision one person for the rest of our lives or at a time like our older generations?
"No way at all, I do think, though, that monogamy is simply an idea that caught on to try to 'normalize' a lot of people to a certain standard. There are a lot of cultures and religions that have nothing against polyamory. And it's also 2015, so like, have open relationships, have more than one partner if your other is OK with it, be in a monogamous one. Who cares? Humans are constantly changing. It isn't too far to say that one day a serious poly-relationship will be viewed with the same respect as a monogamous one. Monogamy isn't dead; it just doesn't satisfy some people's lives anymore."
Leave me your thoughts in the comments.