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I Have Been Single for 3 Years and I Hate It

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October is the most amazing month in the calendar. Hello PSLs, cozy sweaters, scarfs and knee-high boots. The leaves get, like, four different colors all at the same time, and it's time to start to think about Christmas, Halloween and Thanksgiving (uh, but not in that order).

But for many people, it's the start of handful of months when all you want to do it's cuddle in the couch, fireplace on, hot chocolate in hand and devouring Netflix. (Or heading down to the beach and drinking mimosas by the sea while watching the sunset, if you leave below the Equatorial line. Your pick, really!)

This year turns three years since my last official relationship came to an end, and although it was my decision to break-up and being on a break for four months before we say that "enough is enough," that time didn't really made me realize how being single is actually quite upsetting.
But let me give you a little more of background here: I got my first boyfriend when I was 14, and it lasted two and half years. It was always an on-and-off kind of thing, and we were never really said the l-word. We were young, so actually saying "I love you" during that age was quite silly, as many of those relationships never become into a real thing.

My second boyfriend appeared when I was 17, and it lasted on year.

My last relationship, which also was the most serious one, lasted a total of 15 months. In total, I was in relationships for almost five years, non-stop, so being single right now is, like, weird. I am not a needy person, but I like be loved by someone other than my parents and close friends. It's quite hard to have to go to an empty bed every night and think that if maybe I would put myself "out there" more, maybe I would be on a sustainable relationship. But, well, I'm shy, and we can't have it all, can we?

Being single has loads of advantages: from being able to travel on your own to spending money on whatever (and wherever!) you want as well as not shaving your legs for two months and still feeling like you can rock the entire world. Being single can be pretty awesome. But is it worth it, having all of this and not having anyone to grab when watching Unfriended for the first time or someone mocking you over the end of Pretty Woman?
(Cambio Col[lab] is a lab for young creators to showcase their passion and develop their voice. Like what you're seeing? Share it to support their effort!)


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